Her Son Died and Taught Her a System to Talk to Him Daily | Kim Hodous (Episode 178)

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Can you talk to your dead child without being psychic?

What happens when a happiness speaker loses her son at 29 and discovers she can communicate with him daily through automatic writing? Kim Hodous, author of Beyond Grief, shares how her son Rob taught her a system from the other side to connect with him, the profound messages he shares about what happens after death, and why he insists anyone can do this without being psychic or a medium.

About This Episode

Kim Hodous is a happiness speaker, grief recovery coach, and author of Beyond Grief: How a Son's Afterlife Connection Transformed a Mother's Loss into a Remarkable Spiritual Journey. After losing her daughter Chelsea to leukemia 30 years ago, Kim spent two decades as a professional happiness speaker working with corporations and associations. In 2022, while returning from her first live speaking engagement after COVID, she received the devastating call that her son Rob, 29, had died. Despite being clean for two years after seven years of addiction, Rob had used again and died immediately. That night stranded in a snowstorm in a Charlotte hotel, Rob came through to Kim apologizing and saying he was embarrassed. A month later, Kim's psychic friend told her to open her computer the next morning and Rob would be there. Kim started typing and Rob's words poured through—and he hasn't stopped communicating since. A year after his death, Rob came to Kim in a waking dream more real than physical reality to give her one last hug and tell her he was giving her a system called OSCAR to teach other mothers to connect with their children. Kim now teaches mothers how to communicate with their deceased children and offers grief recovery coaching.

In this conversation, we explore:

White Rock Signs from Chelsea

  • Losing daughter Chelsea to leukemia 30 years ago with Monosomy 7

  • Seeing single white rocks glowing everywhere after her death

  • Not understanding what they meant but knowing they were from Chelsea

  • Guest pastor at Unity Church in Sedona telling story of David and Goliath

  • Smooth white stones representing ability to overcome any obstacle

  • Hair standing up on neck realizing Chelsea was speaking through pastor

  • Leaving church that morning a changed person

  • Building million dollar jewelry business from kitchen table

  • Becoming happiness speaker for 15 years researching lasting happiness

Rob's Death and First Contact

  • February 2022: Police call about Rob found dead at 29

  • Stranded alone in nor'easter snowstorm in Charlotte, South Carolina

  • That whole night Rob and Kim together: "I'm so sorry, I'm so embarrassed"

  • Seven years of addiction, two years completely clean

  • 100 people at funeral who didn't know he had drug issue

  • Kim telling Rob all night: "It's okay, I'll make it okay"

  • Psychic friend Eve calling with messages from Rob daily

  • 20 minute voice note about everything that happened at funeral

First Automatic Writing Session

  • March 6: Kim having pity party with Eve about wanting to talk to Rob herself

  • Eve: "Just open your computer in the morning and he'll be there"

  • Journaling for years but never on computer

  • Opening computer next morning: "Rob, I was told if I started typing you'd be here"

  • Fingers flying over keys: "Mama you're here, yay"

  • Rob has not shut up since

  • No consciousness of what's coming through while typing

  • Going back to read it and realizing it's all stuff she never thought before

  • Validation that it's not her thoughts because it's completely new

Messages from the Other Side

  • Greatest relief: Being free from torment and craving for drugs

  • Rob at 29: Tennis pro, athlete, pest control business owner, entrepreneur

  • Did not want to be saddled with burden of addiction

  • Bliss and joy available to everyone regardless of what they did in life

  • Everyone has same access to light and love

  • Murderers, drug dealers, prostitutes, sex traffickers all have equal access

  • First message: "Love is all there is"

  • Even when there's hate, it causes people to love more and wake up

  • Ukraine war example: Whole world sending love and support

  • Everything designed to bring forth more love

Being in Multiple Places at Once

  • Rob can fly, float, twirl, flip, dance in his bliss

  • Can be in Hot Springs with Kim and Fayetteville with brother simultaneously

  • Can jump from one place to another instantly without travel

  • Not being in two places at exact same moment but jumping instantly

  • A portion of soul that's eternal always stays available

  • Chelsea reincarnated but eternal part of her soul still available

  • Some moms want ongoing conversations, some just need to know child is okay

Rob Disappeared for Two Weeks

  • Kim thinking maybe connection was over after two weeks silence

  • Asking "Rob are you here?" and him appearing immediately

  • "Did you hear about shooting in Uvalde?"

  • Rob been helping those kids get to the light and helping their parents

  • "I have work to do over here too, I'm busy"

  • Rob's skills, spirituality, and soul growth happening on other side

The Waking Dream

  • One year after death: Rob came in waking dream more real than physical reality

  • Kim is sound sensitive, wears earplugs to gym, wakes at any noise

  • Daughter spent night, made coffee, toasted bagel—Kim kept sleeping

  • Daughter: "I knew the toaster would wake you up but you kept sleeping"

  • Kim crumpled to ground sobbing when she remembered the dream

  • Had been with Rob, hugged him goodbye, remembers exactly what he wore

  • Ran to computer: Rob explaining he came to give her one last hug

  • Both regretted not getting last hug before he died

  • Rob: "I wanted you to know how real this is"

  • Not going back into a body, staying on other side

  • Giving her system to teach other mothers to connect

The OSCAR System

  • Kim resisting: "I'm not psychic, not a medium, don't have the gift"

  • Rob persistent on other side as he was on this side

  • Took nine months for Rob to give her all pieces of program

  • Kim wanted to call it bliss, heart, love, joy, harmony

  • Rob: "Nope it's OSCAR, we got to lighten this up, bring levity"

  • OSCAR stands for steps: Open channel, Set intention, Command

  • Moms carry children's DNA in body until day they die

  • Children literally with mothers forever

  • Rob: "Mamas are going to be easiest so that's where we'll start"

Rob Saving Lives from the Other Side

  • February 28: Horrible day cleaning out Rob's apartment

  • Kim drinking whiskey in friend Eve's hot tub sobbing

  • Loud crash: Kim's car rolled down steep driveway into tree

  • Car sitting there 45 minutes then suddenly rolled

  • Eve: "Kim, Rob did it"

  • Supply chain issues: Kim's car in shop 6-8 months

  • Had to drive Rob's brother Jordan's terrible X-Terra

  • Couldn't go over 60mph, wind too loud to talk on phone

  • Kim cursing Rob for months about having to drive that car

Italy Bike Trip: Donna's Broken Leg

  • Year later: Kim and husband biking across Italy with brother Bert and Donna

  • Supposed to bike six days to farm-to-table communities

  • Poured torrential rain every day of trip

  • Donna (Harvard grad, brilliant woodworker) programming route on phone

  • Pulling phone out of pocket and swerving on bike

  • Italy drivers flying around mountain corners honking

  • One side mountain, other side 500 foot drop into ocean

  • Kim yelling "Donna, car!" 10 times a day

  • Day three: Kim staying in hotel, not riding in rain anymore

  • Donna and Bert still riding, Donna on ground 50 feet up road

  • Donna writhing in pain—not like her at all

  • Ambulance sirens: Rob comes through "Mom it was me"

Rob's Explanation

  • Someone was going to die in those weather conditions

  • Donna kept pulling phone out and swerving

  • Cars driving crazy in rain

  • Rob: "She was gonna die"

  • That's why he pushed Kim's car into tree months earlier

  • Kim such a mess after his death, would go into autopilot driving

  • Jordan's car forced Kim to pay attention and focus on driving

  • Couldn't be on phone, listen to audiobook, or talk to anyone

  • Kim's car had safety features lighting up for cars beside her

  • Had to drive with intention in the X-Terra

  • Rob: "I saved both of your lives"

  • Wishes people could understand when inconvenient things happen

  • Whole other world operating above us we're not aware of

  • Everything happening to us and for us

  • Why didn't he give Donna flat tire? Would only stop her an hour

  • Donna in hospital four days, they stopped biking entirely

  • Always other things underneath surface of what we see

  • Trust everything happening is for our good

Childhood Leukemia and Reincarnation

  • Chelsea diagnosed with leukemia at young age, three girls and a boy

  • Leukemia had 75% cure rate but Chelsea had Monosomy 7—worst kind

  • Fought for six months

  • Kim and husband held her on 10th floor pediatric bone marrow transplant Minneapolis

  • Held her when she took last breath

  • Devastated, gutted, fell into pit of despair

  • Friends called her Mary Poppins—positive, looked on bright side

  • Chelsea liked having short lifetimes—like going off high dive

  • Loved thrill of jump, came in and shook up entire family

  • Chelsea reincarnated but eternal part of soul always available

  • Communication with Chelsea complete—what she came to teach was complete

No Good, No Bad—Just Love

  • Rob said constantly: "There's no good and there's no bad, it's all love"

  • Editor: "Kim he says this all the time, you're beating a dead horse"

  • Was in book 10 times, now maybe five or six

  • Everything that happens to us happens for us

  • No accidents, no mistakes

  • We agree to certain things before we incarnate

  • Everybody's journey is perfect, what their soul chose

  • Lets Kim take deep breath: Don't have to try to fix anyone or anything

  • Can see through different lens of acceptance

  • Finding good, love, and positivity in every situation

  • So much good came from Rob's death

Soul Families and Hard Truths

  • Ethan sold Rob the drugs knowing it would kill him

  • Rob: Ethan is part of his soul family

  • Ethan raised his hand to stand in that space out of love

  • Previous lifetimes Ethan was Rob's brother

  • Ethan addicted to meth by 12, abused by revolving door of men

  • Horrible childhood, hard life

  • Rob had beautiful life: tennis camps, academies, Maine trips, US Open

  • Ethan now in jail, gets out at 71, got 38 years no parole

  • Who would pick reality where they're abused, murdered, tortured?

  • Beyond Kim's realm of understanding

  • Rob ties everything back to service for our growth

Quantum Time and Ancestral Clearing

  • Some of Rob's messages go over Kim's head

  • When you clear something for yourself, clear seven generations forward and back

  • Kim kind of understands forward (heal yourself, parent better)

  • Seven generations back makes no sense

  • Rob explained as best he could in book

  • Part went over Kim's head too when mentioned

Anyone Can Do This

  • Rob: "Mom that's what makes you perfect—you're not a medium or psychic"

  • Moms Kim works with aren't mediums or psychics either

  • Not mediumship, not being psychic

  • Kim can't give readings for other people or do it for anyone else

  • Some moms took mediumship classes trying to connect with kids

  • Still had trouble even studying mediumship

  • This program just helps connect with your own loved one

  • Children banging on the veil but how much noise does banging on veil make?

  • They're trying but moms can't hear them

  • Rob: "This is going to be piece of cake"

  • Find souls on his side, find moms on that side, bring them together

  • They don't need Kim, don't need system, they are available

Rob's Personality

  • Lit up every room, never turned dark even in addiction

  • Always stayed fun, light, happy

  • Number one foam finger sexy dance in front of tennis crowd

  • Came over and cooked when friends were sick

  • Helped people move in rain when other friends wouldn't show up

  • Served on property committee at Presbyterian Church with 6-7 seventy-year-old men

  • They'd hold shaky ladder, Rob climbed to top to change banners

  • Rob got the power washer for church sidewalks

  • Some Sunday mornings showed up with shaky hands from Saturday night

  • Unicorn among horses walking in so many different worlds

  • 100 people at funeral didn't know he had drug issue

  • Took uniqueness to other side as well

Father the Minister

  • Kim's daddy minister entire life

  • In pulpit two weeks before he passed

  • Age 10: Played church with stuffed animals as congregation

  • Would preach and thump floor for little brother to collect offering

  • Always wanted to be pastor, had doctorate in theology

  • Loved anything to do with spirituality

  • Shirley MacLaine's Out on a Limb about reincarnation

  • Kim asked daddy about mediumship and afterlife

  • "Oh I believe in all of it, we come back"

  • Never said anything about communicating with people

  • Kim believed in reincarnation most of adult life

  • No experience speaking with spirits until Rob

Rob's Book Title and Swear Words

  • Rob wanted book titled: "I Didn't Die I Just Changed Form and a Bunch of Other Shit We Have All Mixed Up"

  • Kim: "Rob buddy, I'm gonna have to override you, pull the mom card"

  • Very taboo in Kim's market, wouldn't even say hell on stage

  • Wanted to be able to mention from stage

  • Few swear words in book, Kim took out a lot

  • Rob was 29 year old single guy, athlete, cool guy

  • Cleaned it up quite a bit but left a few

Kim's Conviction

  • 100% convinced there's an afterlife, 110%

  • Zero doubt in mind that Rob is still there

  • Not a skeptical bone in body

  • Nobody could convince her otherwise

  • Based on communication with Rob

  • Half the stuff in book came from consciousness outside her own

  • Wasn't in her until Rob shared it

  • Now integrated into her belief system as her truth

  • First Mother's Day message: Honor of being a mother, how significant mothers are

  • Often after lifetime as woman and mother, next lifetime you're not

  • Kim: "Hell yes I hope I come back privileged white man next lifetime"

Working with Mothers

  • Nobody entered class thinking they couldn't connect

  • Wouldn't make investment if didn't think there was possibility

  • Some moms gotten way more than expected

  • Most common struggle: Doubt—Is it really him? Is it really her?

  • Kim had doubt in beginning too

  • Now has system to help assure them and prove to themselves

  • Teaching moms in program, also grief recovery coaching

  • Free resources on website

Key Quotes

"Love is all there is. Love is all there is. And even when there's hate or something bad, what that does is it causes people to love more." - Rob through Kim Hodous

"You don't have a problem with me dying. You just have a problem with the timeline." - Rob through Kim Hodous

"I know that this looks horrible to you guys, but in reality, I saved both of your lives. There's a whole other world operating above us that we're not aware of." - Rob through Kim Hodous

"They are over there banging on the veil, but how much noise does it make if you bang on a veil? They're trying, but their moms just can't hear them." - Rob through Kim Hodous

About Kim Hodous

Kim Hodous stands at the intersection of profound loss and extraordinary spiritual discovery. After losing two children, her daughter Chelsea to leukemia and her son Rob at 29, Kim didn't just survive the unthinkable. She transformed it into a luminous bridge between worlds. As the author of Beyond Grief: How a Son's Afterlife Connection Transformed a Mother's Loss into a Remarkable Spiritual Journey, Kim shares the beautiful continuation of her relationship with Rob beyond the veil. Through ongoing communication with Rob via automatic writing, Kim has become a translator of his profound messages about love, purpose, and the eternal nature of our souls. Her teachings on reincarnation, spiritual evolution, and the permeable boundary between life and death offer revolutionary comfort to those walking the path of loss. Kim's approach is refreshingly honest, she doesn't minimize grief or offer hollow platitudes. Instead, she illuminates how authentic connection with our departed loved ones can coexist with deep healing, spiritual awakening, and profound joy. With courage, vulnerability, and unwavering spiritual insight, Kim guides others toward their own afterlife connections while honoring the full spectrum of the grief journey.

Connect with Kim Hodous:
Website: https://www.messagesformoms.com/
Book: Beyond Grief: How a Son's Afterlife Connection Transformed a Mother's Loss into a Remarkable Spiritual Journey
https://amzn.to/4tk66MF
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/messages.for.moms/


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